Monday, August 22, 2011

Stronger and Tougher

Just wanna improve my English skill in writing. Sorry, if it still has many mistakes :)

I'm really proud of my heart. It doesn't need to be asked how my heart has been through and it's being played by something. Something called love. When my feeling is almost neutral, something's coming and suddenly he makes me feel really happy. But when I feel like flying because the happiness is too high, something's really bad comes. And I fall...

Well, it's almost 2 years I keep hiding this feeling and it's not an easy thing, you know. Hmm... absolutely, I don't keep it by myself, some of my friends also know it. But only me who know it specifically. How so deep, how so happy, even how so hurt...

I went to my grandma's house, to calm down myself. Try not to remember about something happened. But, I won't deny it, sometimes I cried in my emptiness. So, I do struggle to neutralize the feeling, to clear my heart from something this crazy thing. So that, I can't fulfill my promise to say directly to him. Sorry if I disappointing some of my friends... I really can't do that. I prefer to keep it from him, until I die... (It's because I read a novel written by Buya Hamka, Di Bawah Lindungan Ka'bah. This novel really inspired me)
And I closed this case, this feeling. Because I've known about something that makes me finally understand, makes me clear, and makes me open my eyes widely. I should end this.

Now, my heart is heal, though it still left a scar. Because I know, it won't be heal 100%. But I still proud of myself, I become stronger and tougher than you ever know it...


  1. i do know how hurt thats feeling fit. so if you wannna end of all this hell, ofcourse i really support u.
    If it’s not happy, it’s not the end. Because everything will be happy in the end.
    maybe your scar will be gone after u find your really prince. ^_^

  2. Yeah, it will be the end about me and him. Because there's still a long road to find my happiness. Just like you said, "Because everything will be happy in the end." :D
    Amiiiin, and u'll find him, also, my sist :) or... have u found him? hahaha

  3. hmmm, found him?.. i don't know and no body know about it. hahahaa :D

  4. u must be a stronger pit.. hehe..

    im always beside you sista...

    Cemungut... ^_^

  5. thank's so much, my sist, for your support :)